Gone, Forever?

Some souls endure pain with a strength that leaves everyone in awe. My Masi fought esophagus cancer with remarkable courage. She stayed with us for more than two years through treatment, but later could not hold on and left us with beautiful memories. One thing that brings us comfort is that as she left, her pain left too, and no suffering remains. Her strength kept her going till then, and not knowing about the cancer perhaps kept her willpower alive to recover. The love of family became an emotional medicine for her. Maybe this is the beginning of something peaceful, something good for her.

Wishing the best for her, while still craving her presence, and this longing leaves me only with tears and loneliness.

Death, how scary it sounds, and you know what? It feels even scarier. Seeing your people go away forever, where there is no coming back. How do you gather the courage to even accept that she is gone forever? You will never see her again.

Having so many memories with that person, and now only those memories stay with you, only melancholy. How do I get over this? Seeing someone since childhood, and now they no longer exist.

This is the brutal truth, that the one who comes has to go. But how do I accept it when your heart shatters, when you can’t hold yourself together, when it feels so heavy?
You miss every moment with her, desperately wanting to see her, hear her voice, touch her, but now you have to accept that she is gone.

How hard it is to go through this, yet you still have to carry it all, find courage within this grief, and keep moving through each day. But this pain within, how do you ease it? This silent breakdown consumes you from inside, knowing that people leave and never come back.

This is heartbreaking, and seeing her go away through all those rituals, that funeral can stay stuck in your head and make you cry out loud. Like what is all this, why does it happen, and why does it feel so unbearably painful? It hurts more than anything. Seeing them gone forever, saying goodbye, gathering the courage to stand there at the funeral and watch it all happen. That unwavering feeling stays within you. It makes you question what life truly is, this world or the afterlife.

The lesson I learned from this is to be grateful and be kind to everyone. People often say you don’t have to be nice to everyone, that you should just be yourself and prioritise your own things, but when it comes to the heart, it just wants to give, and being kind takes nothing. Love the people around you. Life is so unpredictable, and you never know when you are seeing someone for the last time. So be good. Make sure you create good memories with everyone.

They leave, leave everything behind, and left behind are the people who miss them forever.

Hope life is fair to everyone.

"The human heart is delicate.
It breaks in moments of sorrow,
yet gathers itself in silence
and rises stronger than before.

Keep your heart strong,
but never let it lose its softness.
Be gentle with those around you,
for the deepest wounds
often teach the truest kindness."